Three former members departed. Civilization trembled. Servers remained online.
Against impossible odds, Exfil's Expendables somehow continued playing video games.
OVEROperation Status
OURSHub Status
0%Actual Emergency
This page is satire and community parody. It makes no allegation of cheating, hacking,
criminal conduct or other misconduct. Nobody is being asked to contact, report or harass anyone.
Please enjoy the joke and continue stealing each other's loot like civilized people. Be Careful what you wish for.
⚠ THE GREAT BETRAYAL HAS OCCURRED •
THREE MEMBERS DEPARTED •
WEBSITE STILL ONLINE •
FACEBOOK SURVIVED •
YOUTUBE SURVIVED •
LOOTING CONTINUES AS NORMAL •
EGOS REMAIN UNACCOUNTED FOR •
THREAT LEVEL: EMBARRASSINGLY LOW •
Priority Transmission
The Day Everything Changed.
According to surviving records, PaulScotland (exfilsboogyman.EE), Clausethemouse and Timbo200
departed the
Expendables following a period of escalating drama, strong opinions and what historians
have described as “a truly heroic amount of believing your own hype and taking this shit too
seriously.”
At approximately some time nobody bothered writing down, three members walked away expecting the walls to shake.
The walls did not shake. The Expendables continued playing video games. The world continued....Wait....They
actually didn't walk away either, they were escorted out.
After Action Report // XXP-003
Official Damage Assessment
Command immediately initiated a complete review of territorial, digital and emotional losses.
The findings were devastatingly uneventful.
3Members Lost
0Territory Lost
0Websites Captured
0Facebook Pages Captured
0YouTube Channels Captured
0Community Wipes Caused
Personnel Registry
The Three-Man Uprising
The least successful Egocentric campaign in Expendables history.
Paulscotland
Former member. Current sovereign ruler of approximately zero Expendables infrastructure.
Also known as ExfilsBoogyman.EE
Departed
Clausthemouse
Former member. Participated in the historic campaign to seize absolutely nothing.
Fun Fact: A mouse is in the same family as a weasel.
Departed
Timbo200
Former member. Exact whereabouts unknown.
Still trying to figure out how we do what we do.
Departed
Historical Record
Timeline of the Conflict
T–00:00
The Departure
Three men huff and puff. Dramatic music begins for reasons nobody understands.
T+00:03
Emergency Systems Check
The website loads normally. Command is stunned.
T+00:05
Social Infrastructure Assessment
Facebook remains Facebook. This is considered both a victory and a tragedy.
T+00:07
Strategic Counter-Offensive
Three passwords are changed. Historians later describe the maneuver as decisive.
T+00:20
Return to Normal Operations
Someone asks if anybody wants to run a raid. Exfils Expendables carry on as usual.
Emergency Directive
XXP Response Plan
Following extensive consultation with command, intelligence, logistics and whoever happened
to be online, the following response was unanimously authorized:
Change the passwords.
Continue playing Exfil Zone.
Turn the entire situation into content.
Absolutely refuse to pretend this is more important than it is.
Official Communiqué
Good Luck Boys.
We wish our former members success in their future endeavors. Preferably somewhere else.
One team's trash is another team's treasure.
Come and pick up our garbage.
For real. They keep trying to get back in.
Operation Status // We're Already Over It
This page is satire and community parody. It makes no allegation of cheating, hacking,
criminal conduct or other misconduct. Nobody is being asked to contact, report or harass anyone.
Please enjoy the joke and continue stealing each other's loot like civilized people. Be Careful what you wish for.